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Breaking News...
President Obama talking to Nobel Peace Prize committee assistant Astrid Gunnarsson. OSLO, Norway - In a shocking development The Nobel Peace Prize Governing Committee has stated that President Barack Obama must return the Nobel Peace Prize immediately.
Committee Chairman Thorbjorn Jagland, stated that his assistant Astrid Gunnarsson noted that on President Barack Obama's registration form that he had inadvertently failed to write in his place of birth in the required blank.
Miss Gunnarsson was instructed by her boss to call up the American president and tell to him simply fax over a copy of his birth certificate.
Gunnarsson said that when she mentioned it to the president, there was total silence on his end.
She figured that maybe he had not heard her due to some sort of technical malfunction so she asked him again. But this time the president told her that he did not have his birth certificate handy.
She asked him if he could please find it and fax it to her as soon as possible for the needed Nobel Peace Prize Committee confirmation, which is required of all Nobel Peace Prize winners.
The president informed Miss Gunnarsson that his wife, the beautifully sleeveless Michelle must have misplaced it when they moved from their modest home in Illinois to the multi-million dollar, extremely spacious White House.
He told Miss Gunnarsson that he had only just yesterday finally found his Kobe Bryant autographed basketball which had been missing for ten months.
President Obama also informed Miss Gunnarsson that his wife, the "First Mama" was still trying to find their daughter's Malia and Sasha's snow sled, winter mittens, and snowman making kit.
Miss Gunnarsson said that they would need to have a copy of the birth certificate or else they would have to respectfully ask that he return the Nobel Peace Prize right away.
The president lost his temper and yelled out, "Respectfully ask!, now young lady you tell me just how the hell one can ask the leader of the free world, the man who is president of the greatest nation on earth, and a man who has actually gone one-on-one with the greatest basketball player of all time, Michael Jordan, to respectfully return the effen mofoing Pulitzer Peace Prize?"
Miss Gunnarsson corrected him and said that it was not the Pulitzer Peace Prize, but the Nobel Peace Prize.
The president took a deep breath and remarked, "WHAT-ev-ERRR bitch."
He then told Miss Gunnarsson that he is real good friends with King Olaf the Fifth of Norway and that he was going to personally call him and demand that he terminate her sardine-eating butt.
Miss Gunnarsson told him that he did not scare her and that he really needed to stop acting like that other rude-as-shit African-American fella Kanye West.
President Obama quickly informed her that he was only half-African-American and the rest of him was half-white.
Miss Gunnarsson then told him that he needed to put his African-American part away and let his half-white side take over because, frankly she was getting real close to hanging up on the black part of his arrogantly pompous double-raced ass.
Brobama, as Vice-President Joe Biden calls him, told her in no uncertain terms that no one talks to the president of America like that.
He then added that furthermore no one, not even the Queen of America Oprah Winfrey herself, hangs up on him because he is the president of the United States. He paused for a few seconds and then asked her what she thought about that.
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Although, If Hitler was alive, He would be proud!
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