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Let me start off saying that me and my sister are 3 yrs and 1 day apart. I'm 35 and she is 32. Yesterday she graduated from Drug Court. As many of you might remember my father passed away on September 30, 2012. So I took my father's place in court and along side my mom we were there to see her graduate. My sister was required to speak and following we were asked to speak on her behalf. It was very emotional. Every person in the court room had tears. From those who just started their Drug Court to the Judge. The State had dropped all previous charges (6 total) and now she is free, it's took her 2 years but it was well earned. Don't misunderstand me, it wasn't just 2 years it started when she was fourteen. Eighteen years ago. If you would like to read about her incredible journey please continue. Yes, I will tell her story. I'm proud of her and I'm sure our father is watching down from Heaven beaming with pride also.

It started 23 years ago, when my parents got divorced. I went to stay with our dad (grandparents) while my sister lived with our mom. My dad as many of you might remember was an alcoholic. Well my sister ran away and dropped out of school in the 9th when she was Fourteen. Basically another child who thinks they know it all and party without a care in the world. Someone who thought that everything would be handed to them. She ended up getting with a guy (Shane) three years older then her but had also dropped out in the 6th grade. After a few years of partying they tried to settle down and have kids. Her first was born when she was 18. They had a total of 3 and kept partying/using. When she turned 25 they decided to split up (common law married only) and they would share time with the kids. One would get them 3 days and the other 4, and switch off time. My sister went to live with my grandparents and got her a job working at Old Navy. She seemed to of changed her life around but it was short lived. When the kids were with their dad my sister would go out and party. Shane's mother (Pam)decided that she wanted guardianship of the kids and went down to human services (DHS) and filed for temporary guardianship of the kids. She had the papers sent to an address my sister wasn't at and someone forged her signature. So when the court date arrived my sister wasn't there and temp guardianship was awarded to Shane's mother. They came over and got the kids showing a court order. My sister confused and devastated called DHS and they confirmed it. Shane and Pam took the kids. My grandparents jumped into action and helped my sister get a lawyer. Because me sister had proof of where she lived and that it wasn't her signature the judge threw case was out and my sister got the kids back. That again was short lived. Within a month my sister was allowing the kids to stay longer and longer with their dad/Pam so she could go out and party. Pam decided to try another trick and this time called DHS on my sister and grandparents. My grandfather was on oxygen 24 hrs a day so they decided that it was unsafe. What Pam didn't realize was that they investigated her and decided her house was unfit/safe. I found out 2 months later that the kids were in DHS custody and were in danger of being split up. So me and my ex-wife (still married at the time) got a bigger house, etc and was able to foster my niece and 2 nephews. I had them over 2-1/2 yrs and it cost me a divorce but it was well worth it. During those 2-1/2 yrs my sister was in and out of jail, Shane too. Until finally he got himself straightened and was able to get the kids back. My sister had got out of rehab and met a guy also in rehab and seemed to straighten her self back out but like all the other times, she failed. He started drinking and doing drugs (reason he was in rehab) and my sister fell back into drugs, etc. They split and she started writing stolen checks and he got busted robbing a guy and killing his dog. While he is still currently in jail my sister was given a choice by the judge. Drug Court or 10 years in jail. Of course my sister chose Drug Court and was doing good for a few months. Then she fell back into her old habits. I'm not sure what it was but that last time she got busted I spoke to her. I told her that she had already missed a good portion of her kids life and if she kept going that route she would never she her kids again. She worked for the next 2 yrs like no one's business. She bought her first (legal) car, along with getting her Driver License (never had one), and even got her GED. When our father passed away last year we weren't sure if she was going to go back to her old habits in order to cope with his death. But she worked even harder to accomplish her goal. Now she is a shift manager at a restaurant, see's her kids every chance she get, and even our relationship has healed. We get together once a month and have dinner. A new family tradition.
 

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Thanks for sharing this story of a person beating addiction. You played a big part in it by loving your sister unconditionally. It would have been easy and somewhat understandable if you would have walked away. I love these kind of stories. It gives others hope that you can win and live a sober normal healthy life no matter what has happened in the past.
Thanks again for sharing.
Mark

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Congrats to her for getting herself straightened out and doing the right thing.

My cousin started using when we were younger than her, and she OD'd when she was 15 and died. I don't care if someone wants to smoke a little dope, but when you get into anything unnatural or synthetic or is made from industrial cleaners, is where I will draw the line, and I WILL (and have) kicked someone's ass for pulling out coke at a party or at my house before.
 

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Wow. Takes a great deal of strength to deal with a situation such as that. More power to you and your sister. Here is hoping that the future is a far happier one. :thumb
 

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Discussion Starter #6
I also posted this on Facebook, on both my news feed and on her wall. That way everyone knows what she accomplished. ;)


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I am happy for you both, sometimes things do not go as planed.... Glad you were there to help out the kids and your sister, that can not be easy and sounds like it cost you your marriage? It takes someone very devoted to his family to do that... Hope the kids are doing well??
 

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Take a minute and be proud of yourself while you are at it. Your sister needed the help and you manned up and provided all you could. :hero
 

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Man, that's a great story! Thanks for sharing.

I have a few friends who can't shake that alcohol monkey off their backs. It's really sad.
 

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good on ya both. last thursday i went with my youngest daughter to recieve her 1 year chip from n/a.....one day at a time:thumbsup
 

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I'm very happy for the both of you. That was a very good story, and there are many reasons everybody to be proud. I'm sure that even her kids are happy with the changes taking place.
 

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Life's hard. People make mistakes. Some more than others, but this type of story goes to show that if you have perseverance and determination you can turn your life around.

She was lucky. She had family to support her. Don't think your job is over. You need to be there for them now more than ever, because it will be easy for her to fall back into her old, known routine. I hope and pray that for her, yours and the kids, well being that she succeeds. It's a never ending process. Good luck to her!

Good job to you Sir for being there for your family! :thumbsup Many men (and I use that term loosely) are not even there for their own kids, much less their brothers/sisters, so this speaks highly of your personal character!
 

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I am an only child so I can't fathom what it would be like to see a sibling go through such hardship and strife.

I can relate a little though. Of the 10 cousins in my family, three of us aren't screw ups. Drugs, alcohol, stealing, mugging, etc.....I've seen what it does to my aunts and uncles. Because of that I have very little sympathy for addicts. It is a place you get to of your own cognizance. However, I know how hard it is to kick and I am extremely proud of her.

More so, I am so very impressed by your actions. Not only were you there for her AND the baby daddy, but you took in her children and kept them in the family. Not a lot of people would do that and you should be commended for it.


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Discussion Starter #20
Thanks for the support everyone and the words of encouragement. It was not always easy for either of us. When the kids were in my gaurdianship she was not allowed to see them otherwise I risked loosing them. She begged me just to let her see them. Like I said it wasn't always easy but we endured.
 
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